Etc.

But, hey, thanks anyway

It took Leroy Rosenior 10 minutes to adjust to the idea that he was the new head coach of England's Torquay United pro soccer team for the 2007-08 season. And then – just like that – he wasn't anymore. If you're keeping score at home, that is the new record for the shortest stint as a mentor in the history of the sport, at least in Britain. Torquay has struggled to win games recently, or Rosenior wouldn't have been offered the job in the first place. In fact, he was the fourth man named to the post in less than a year. Still, he'd coached there in happier times, so management knew all about his leadership abilities. And that's why a news conference was called to present him formally to the news media. Sportswriters and broadcasters gathered at Torquay's offices in Devon one day last month to hear all about how he would right the ship. By 3:30 p.m. it was over, and they were packing their cameras, microphones, and notepads to leave when the telephone rang. Team owner Mike Bateson was on the line, and he had an update: He'd agreed to sell the team, but the buyers wanted to go in the proverbial different direction, so Rosenior was out. He took the news graciously, even turning it into a joke. For those 10 minutes, he quipped, "they thought I had done a fantastic job." Then he added, "They are going to sort me out a bit of compensation" for the inconvenience. The old record for shortest tenure as coach of an English professional team: three days.