Scribbles on Corporate Building? Better See Graffiti-Removal Trainee

ARE you having trouble dealing with your own kind? You might want to consult with a ``vice president, people.'' Shocked by the scribbles on a corporate building? You might be put in touch with a ``graffiti-removal trainee.''

Unhappy with your snack-time drink? Perhaps a ``second vice president in charge of grapes'' could help you.

No kidding. These are real job titles held by real people, according to a recent nationwide survey conducted for Accountemps, the world's largest temporary staffing service for accounting, finance, and information technology.

For the survey, 200 executives from the nation's 1,000 largest companies were asked the question: ``What is the most unusual job title you've ever heard of?''

The responses ranged from the humorous - ``deputy director of anything'' - to the confusing - ``director of direct reporting,'' ``manager of innovation,'' and ``procurement activist,'' for example.

Robert Half, the founder of Accountemps, summed up the survey findings this way: ``Titles go a long way toward adding prestige to a position and boosting employee morale. The trick is to avoid going too far by bestowing inappropriate or overblown titles.''