Loving others, no matter what
With dissension in politics, families, workplaces, and more, we might ask, Are antagonistic relationships an inevitable part of life?
Turning to the Bible for answers on this subject has helped me considerably. Christ Jesus provided powerful guidance when he said, “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself” (Matthew 22:37-39).
To better obey “the first and great commandment,” I consistently check that my thoughts and actions are based on living my love for God. This includes looking at troubling personal, community, and world situations and affirming both God’s omnipresence and His governance of all involved.
Obeying the first great commandment naturally leads to obeying the second, since truly loving God requires loving His creation. The Bible story about an early Christian named Ananias serves as a helpful example (see Acts 9:10-20). At the time, Saul, who would later become known as Paul, was persecuting Christians. Saul became blind after hearing Christ Jesus’ voice directing him to go to Damascus and await next steps.
Meanwhile, Ananias, who was living in Damascus, heard Jesus’ voice in a vision instructing him to go to Saul and restore his sight. Although Ananias questioned this instruction because he knew the evils Saul had committed, he was obedient because of his love for and trust in God. The biblical account says that in their interaction, Ananias called Saul, “Brother Saul.”
For me, those two simple words speak volumes. They show how completely someone’s thought can be transformed through humbly following God’s direction. Ananias came to Saul not as an adversary but as a fellow child of God. He must have felt the Christ – the true idea of God, whose healing presence and power underlay Jesus’ teachings and works. Christ must have touched Saul as well, because Saul not only regained his sight but also immediately became a follower of Christ.
Emulating Ananias’ obedience to God and loving response to Saul has become a goal that I strive for when I have a conflict with someone. I ask myself, “Can I call this person brother or sister and really mean it?”
Here are some thoughts that have come to me as I’ve prayed: “Love others as I (God) love them, as perfect, spiritual expressions of Me, divine Spirit. See them as the unfoldment of infinite good in unique and valued ways. Acknowledge them as My perfect handiwork, without an element of mortality.”
A few years ago, I applied these ideas in a modest way on a basketball court where I play regularly. I noticed that one player competed more aggressively than the rest of us. Others spoke of his hostility. This made me wary of him. Then one day he did not approve of a couple of plays that I made and started criticizing me and pushing me around while we played. I started praying in earnest about this animosity.
The first thing I thought of was a By-Law from the “Manual of The Mother Church” by Mary Baker Eddy that had been part of my prayers that morning. It concludes, “The members of this Church should daily watch and pray to be delivered from all evil, from prophesying, judging, condemning, counseling, influencing or being influenced erroneously” (p. 40). The words “judging,” “condemning,” and “erroneously” jumped out at me because I realized I had been doing exactly that.
I prayerfully reasoned that God loved this individual and created him perfectly. I needed to see him as my brother in God’s family, and I held to this spiritual view. Soon, he backed off from his verbal and physical aggression.
Afterward, I made a point of going up to him to acknowledge the good game we had played. He looked surprised and grunted a response, but I was grateful that the hard feelings expressed on the court seemed to have faded away.
When I showed up for our next game, he came up to me and apologized wholeheartedly for his behavior the previous week. There was no more criticism, and he even started to comment on ways that I was playing well. His demeanor toward the other players improved too.
Although our prayers may seem like small contributions in a world full of disagreements and trouble, each sincere prayer, lived, brings more love to our interactions with others, and the blessings ripple out into our communities and the world.
Adapted from an article published in the Sept. 4, 2023, issue of the Christian Science Sentinel.
